Watching TV news makes me feel quite normal at times, which is at least an improvement. The usual news is awash with failure, and success is often wiped from the headlines by celebrity scandal and political fiscal gloom.

Why does news reporting in the media frequently choose to emphasise negative events?  Perhaps it is still partly influenced by the old editorial adage, “If it bleeds, it leads.”  In other words, if there is a film of the red stuff — metaphorical red stuff, we hope — being spilt on the pavement (still metaphorical) this is what will be the leading news item. Which is not to say that editors aren’t capable of causing real blood to be spilt during circulation wars.

Bad things can happen quickly, good things can sometimes take longer than a day. Plane crashes always make the news, car crashes seldom do, despite the fact that they kill far more people. This is why so many people suffer from fear of flying, while few suffer from fear of driving, unless they have been in the passenger seat of my car.

Tornadoes — I feel another figure of speech coming on, I think this one’s a simile — are like the celebrities of weather forecasts, they make for much more spectacular images than, say, a downpour in  Manchester, where it rains on 205 days each year, now you know why that summer holiday you just booked was so cheap.

TV news also promotes the fiction that (a) we are all interested in politics and (b) we like a sprinkling of depressing news about price rises at breakfast time, which makes us return half of our cornflakes to the packet.

Try to escape the bad news, and what do we see?  Modern television has become more or less wall-to-wall so-called ‘reality’ shows, except those that take place outdoors. People chase other people in fake parodies of better-acted TV dramas with real actors instead of ungifted amateurs.

Versions of dating shows must surely be exhausted soon — I know I am, by constantly changing channels. Boy meets girl in jungle/on an island/somewhere without the contestants being able to see one another until they eventually (!) fall in love and get married. Instant food I have no objection to, but instant wedlock with an unseen person?  Call me Doubting David. Couples don’t ever buy the properties they view on property shows, but at least they get to see them in advance of not fancying them, without the need for a subsequent expensive divorce.

Anyhow, you’ll be glad to learn that I have now reached the end of this particular rant about the behaviour of news broadcasters. So at least that is some good news for you.

“My TV won’t show any good news.”