“You play a Slazenger 1. don’t you?” “Yes, why?” “This is a Slazenger 7.  Mine’s the Penfold Heart. You played the wrong ball, somewhere on the 18th. Strict rules of golf Goldfinger, I’m afraid you lose the hole and the match.”

Famous words from the 1964 film.   The young Sean Connery had to take golfing lessons before filming the scene to make it look authentic.  It started his life-long love affair with golf.    Gert Frobe who played Auric Goldfinger, was already a good golfer.  Stoke Park Golf Club was the backdrop for one of cinema’s most celebrated golf duels, and after the release of Goldfinger sales of the Penfold Heart rocketed.

The logo is different now and golfballs with the original logo claim high prices. A limited set of one dozen Penfold Hearts has been produced to celebrate the anniversary of Ian Fleming’s birth.

BRYSON DECHAMBEAU endured his worst ever score on one hole on the par 5 15th at the Memorial.   After a tee shot in the water and three shots out-of bounds, one of which he loudly contested, Dechambeau stomped after his ball, chipped onto the green and

2-putted for ten.  He missed the cut.  Just goes to show that brawn’s not much good without the brain.

THE EUROPEAN TOUR six-week ‘UK Swing’ marches on with the English Championship on August 6th at Hanbury Manor, Celtic Classic and Wales Open at Celtic Manor on August 13th and  20th and the  UK Championship at the Belfry on August 27tth.   

Keith Pelley, European Tour CEO, who has been tying himself in knots revising the schedules, said there’s no date for the Irish Open but the BMW PGA Championship will be held at Wentworth on 14th October.

The Scottish Open will now take place on 8th  October at The Renaissance Club, North Berwick (provided Ms. Sturgeon is letting anybody in.)  It’s a hard enough course without having to  tee off into a cold October wind on 500+ yd par 4’s.  Porridge for breakfast and thermal underwear recommended.

BERNHARD LANGER will be at Augusta for the annual Champions Dinner on the Tuesday evening in October. He never misses an opportunity to dust off the green jacket.    Having played in 35 Masters he said that being at home for the second week of April felt peculiar: “I have never played Augusta in the autumn.

I hear the conditions will be similar to April, just with not so many flowers,  but that’s okay – hopefully I can keep out of the flowerbeds anyway!”

Langer  (62) planned his own fitness routines during the enforced break.  “I swing a lead-weighted 7 iron, have a treadmill, exercise bike and pool,  and I do putting and chipping in our back yard.”   Forget washing lines and dustbins, this is Bernhard Langer’s backyard, the size of Wentworth.

Unfortunately being fit as a butchers dog didn’t help him at the Ally Challenge, Michigan when the Seniors Tour resumed on August 2nd.  He came in 7th behind  Jim Furyk who won comfortably at 14 under.   Back to the press-ups.

ANOTHER GOLFER with a brain the size of a pea.  When play was suspended due to lightning at the Workday Charity Open at Muirfield Village reigning U.S. Open champion Gary Woodland sprinted for the buggies closest to the hole he was on and tried to make a quick getaway.  Unfortunately the buggy was parked in reverse and Gary ended up tangled in a fence.  Pity there were no spectators, but his opponent had a good laugh.

TOM CRUISE chose to accept his Mission Impossible to land a helicopter on the 9th green at Richmond Golf Course, walk into the elegant early Georgian clubhouse in jeans and trainers and demand lunch.  The normally sniffy restaurant obliged him.  They couldn’t know his cheque would self-destruct in 30 seconds.

Until next time, Happy Golfing.

Contact Mick  for regrippng and repairs. Tel 638 859 475.