Looking at paintings in an art gallery recently (correct, Gorls … not my familiar forte) I came to the conclusion that people are happier in today’s world than was ever the case down through the centuries. If you look back on old photographs, you will rarely see people smiling. From riff-raff to royalty, the common denominator was a glum expression.
Chances are that if you peruse the photographs in this week’s paper; amongst every group, every couple, and random dudes, a majority will be offering you a smile. Now, compare these photos with a selection from a hundred years ago. Spot the difference?
Let us take a wedding photo from a hundred years ago – or back as far as you like: Remember, this is meant to be the happiest day of one’s life, but in the olde world of black and white, it doesn’t look like this – judging by the expressions. Typically the bride is sitting very ‘proper like’ on a straight-back chair. The groom stands with his hand resting … not anywhere on his brand new bride, but gripping the top of the chair. He looks as if the dowry cheque has just bounced, and the young woman has that look on her face that suggests she has just found out that this deal entails cooking 18,000 family dinners, breakfasts and suppers and rearing as many children as God sends.
Back to the paintings – and I still know as little as I did in the first line above; but most of us would have heard of the famous painting by Frans Hals, called ‘The Laughing Cavalier.’ It was painted in 1624 and is undoubtedly one of the great works of art, but to me, the cavalier is not laughing. The man proffers no more than a rather mischievous smile. It may well be that the painting became famous due to the contrast of all the gloominess either side of it.
If we are to judge the good humour of today against the graveness of a bygone age, how else can we do it other than by comparing photos, paintings and images? What about statues? Have you ever seen a happy saint? And at the risk of offending my more religious friends, the ceist has to be asked; does Jesus or any of the 12 apostles ever look as if this is a great day to be out and about?
The above evidence proves that we smile more today than did our ancestors. The cynics among you might claim that a lot of this is an insincere façade. But even if some of it is; as a guy from Northern Ireland said to me a long time ago; ‘I’d rather be told to have a nice day by somebody who didn’t mean it, than be told to fu#k off by somebody who did!’ Yes, there is the insincere smile; a first cousin of the sneer and you will usually know the difference. The smile appearing on a soccer player’s face after the referee gives a free against him is a good example in this category. What we are on about here is the genuine smile.
When you meet someone wearing a soft smile it conveys openness and willingness to engage with you. If this is somebody you have an appointment with, a smile establishes a rapport, and places you at ease in their company.
There are a lot of different smiles, which allow for nuanced communication. A mere hint of a smile might indicate approachability, whilst a big broad smile signifies enthusiasm and joy. The beauty here is that most often a smile begets another smile. Life is like a mirror. If we frown, it frowns back and if we smile it returns the greeting.
Some people just have a ‘smiley face’ and we all feel drawn to such a person. I have also met terrific people with a ‘stern face’, but the one with the smile is more likely to win us over.
Don’t Forget
For only the third time in the 17 years of YCBS, I am availing of this privileged platform to ask for your support; not for me, but for The Irish Hospice Foundation. There is hardly a family that doesn’t know what the hospice does – so no need to explain that one.
Last year a group of us did a sponsored ‘Camino Challenge’ and in doing so, we raised €72,928 for the Hospice Foundation. On 24th September, a week after my 80th birthday, I am walking another sponsored section of the Camino, from Estella to Burgos.
In asking for your sponsorship, it is important that you know I am paying all my own expenses, so that every cent donated will go to The Irish Hospice Foundation. You can help bring a smile to someone’s face during their last days! No amount is too small because; ‘through small and simple things, do great things come to pass.’
If you are kind enough to sponsor me; you can either give me your money directly, or donate on line to: https://www.idonate.ie/fundraiser/BernieIHF2024
Go raibh maith agat.
